Blue: Uthamans Onam-09

Onam is a great something for Malayalees wherever they are. The main Onam day is special for its feast. Uthaman, like any other Malayalee was excited to celebrate it in a big way and decided to eat out in a posh Mallu mess somewhere near the 80-feet road at Indira nagar.

He knew that cursing himself for being at this ooru was of no use and has a real positive attitude towards life. He was not at all jealous about his friends being in Kerala leaving him alone at the posh apartment in the Domlur market.

It was not quite surprising that he decided to have a thechu kuli or ritualistic bath before his lunch, as kuli is a very important item for any Kerala festival. Today he had decided even on which songs he should sing while taking bath.He started with the much old Onam song “Maveli naadu vanidumkaala’’…slowly it changed to "oru muraai vanthu parthaya" and so on and so forth….meanwhile he applied the traditional Medimix soap to wherever possible.. ..So, to sum it up, he had a rich and authentic bath and felt that he was at home after several years

Time was 1.20 pm and all Mallu mess's in Bangalore were kach-ing pappadams…the fragrance of Avilyal and Sambar flew into the posh bathroom and Uthaman took a deep breath and said “bhesh”

Uthaman was in a hurry, all the 56 dishes of the meal splashed into his brain in a fraction of a second.

Alas-the Door! It is closed for ever out of excitement.

He was patient for a few minutes, attempted all the 108 tricks he knew. Sorry said the door :(

After two hours of remorseless attempt, he says ‘I did the right thing, I started yelling’. Sadly by that time all Malayalees in Bangalore had almost finished their afternoon nap after their superb meal.

Today, Uthaman is a proud Malayalee. He could manage the crisis in a matter of 4 hours. He could speak the right Hindi at the right time at the right place. Though you can relate this to the 4 Ps of Marketing, this event has much more impact, as this was a game of do or die for a human soul.

“I did the right thing; he reiterates; if I had not yelled the right Hindi, I would have ended my life there….. Onam will come and go, but life is only once”

Reporters were eager to know how Uthaman who knew little Hindi could speak to his neighbor through the tiny window he had in the bathroom.

“My Hindi was so good at that point” says he

“Bhaiyya, mein Bathroom ke anthar Ghoos gaya, Bachavo Bachavo” I yelled this mantra for an hour and that helped; Uthaman said reporters after the narrow escape.